Week 11: More Like Weak Eleven

I haven’t had much time to tally up my record recently. All I know is that I’m pretty sure I haven’t really closed the gap on .500. My Vince Russo Four have also been largely ineffective. Oh well.

MINNESOTA (-4.5) over Oakland
PHILADELPHIA (-9.5) over Miami
JACKSONVILLE (-3) over San Diego
Cleveland (-2.5) over BALTIMORE
HOUSTON (+1) over New Orleans
ATLANTA (+3) over Tampa Bay
Arizona (+3) over CINCINNATI
GREEN BAY (-9.5) over Carolina
Pittsburgh (-9.5) over NY JETS
St. Louis (-3) over SAN FRANCISCO
Chicago (+5.5) over SEATTLE
Washington (+11) over DALLAS

VINCE RUSSO FOUR:
Kansas City (+14.5) over INDIANAPOLIS: Yeah, this is probably a stupid pick. But I do think Indy is winning. Just not by 15.
DETROIT (-3) over NY Giants: God’s team likes to run it up. Sweet.
NEW ENGLAND (-15.5) over Buffalo: Buffalo’s a good team. And I think they might even be able to cover this week. But every time I’ve picked against the Pats, I’ve failed. Which was once. Against Buffalo.
Tennessee (+2) over DENVER: I dunno.

Week 10: Super Duper Gambling Bloopers

Cleveland (+10) over PITTSBURGH
WASHINGTON (-3) over Philadelphia
CAROLINA (-3) over Atlanta
GREEN BAY (-5.5) over Minnesota
TENNESSEE (-4.5) over Jacksonville
KANSAS CITY (-3) over Denver
BALTIMORE (-3) over Cincinnati
Dallas (-1.5) over NY GIANTS
Bears (-3.5) over OAKLAND
SEATTLE (-9.5) over San Francisco

THE VINCE RUSSO FOUR
Buffalo (-2) over MIAMI: Decent team taking on team that has not and may not win a game? Pretty good bet. Line set under a field goal? Great bet.
NEW ORLEANS (-10) over St. Louis: So the Saints are back, I guess? Whatever. The Rams suck. That’s all I need to make my ruling.
Detroit (-1.5) over ARIZONA: Detroit is good, right? Didn’t they put up like 44 points on Denver last week? And sure, Denver sucks, but thats still 44 points. So I’ll take that 1.5 line, thanks.
Indianapolis (-3.5) over SAN DIEGO: Indy’s probably gonna be a little motivated after last week, and the Chargers still suck. Although, I have to wonder how Indy will do without the fake crowd noise helping them out.

Oh, that’s right, it wasn’t fake. They just reverberated the sound of the crowd back out through the speakers. That’s all. Dungy’s a good guy, remember. Not like that Belichick. I don’t like him. Remember when BeliCHEAT (I made that up just now, pretty good, huh) said he didn’t support gay marriage? That was Belichick, right? I can’t remember. J-E-T-S JETS JETS JETS!!!

Week 9: What happened to Week 8? Just kidding!

Yeah, so I kinda got insanely drunk last weekend and didn’t really wake up in time to make my picks, so I kinda had to skip the week. Awwww. Anyway, I’m doing something new this week. I’m still picking each game, but now I’m going to pick four lines that I’m most confident in. My logic is, I don’t want to have to bet on a Miami vs St. Louis game with a spread of -4 either way. But I’ve had fun picking the Pats the last few weeks because I’ve known every time they’re gonna cover. So starting this week, I’m giving you the Vince Russo Four; four picks that will lose you a lot of money, but it’s okay, because I thought it was a good idea.

I’m kinda in a hurry this week, so only witty comments for the Vince Russo Four. Home team in CAPS.

San Diego (-7) over MINNESOTA
Jacksonville (+3) over NEW ORLEANS
TAMPA BAY (-3.5) over Arizona
San Francisco (+3) over ATLANTA
BUFFALO (-1) over Cincinnati
TENNESSEE (-4) over Carolina
Seattle (+1.5) over CLEVELAND
Houston (+3) over OAKLAND
Dallas (-3) over PHILADELPHIA
PITTSBURGH (-9) over Baltimore

THE VINCE RUSSO FOUR
New England (-5.5) over INDIANAPOLIS: I wouldn’t be a terrible homer if I didn’t. Although I don’t think the Colts will win.
Green Bay (-2) over KANSAS CITY: It seems to me Green Bay might, in fact, be the real deal. At least in the regular season. They still have no runningback.
Washington (-3.5) over NY JETS: I run the risk of Kellen Clemens becoming the next, well, not Tom Brady, but certainly the next Chad Pennington. But I think Washington’s pissed after last week.
DETROIT (-3) over Denver: I don’t really feel confident about this one, but I couldn’t find a fourth. Plus, they’re God’s team. And after His baseball team lost in the World Series, I bet He’s pissed.