It’s back. Tuesday Night Titans is here again for at least the next 21 weeks. I can’t promise anything, but I’ll do my best to try and do it every single week.
What are ya playin?: It’s been a busy summer for me in the game department, although most of them were handheld titles, which didn’t do much to move along the massive queue I’ve built up in the console department. I don’t feel like giving long reviews to each of them, but here are my thoughts on what I got done.
Super Paper Mario – Very pretty game, nice music, good control, all that jazz. Physically, it’s a very good game. But I just didn’t have a lot of fun playing it. I never got into the story, and the gameplay, a cross between an RPG and a platformer, wasn’t RPGey enough or Platformey enough to be worth it either way. I only finished it because I felt obligated to. Sonic Adventure Syndrome.
Legend of Zelda: Minish Cap – Great great GREAT game. I tend to go on a lonely crusade often where I tell people that Link to the Past isn’t nearly as good a game as people think it is; rather, it does everything well, but nothing perfect. I may have mentioned this before. Anyway, Minish Cap took everything that was good about Link to the Past and made it much, much better. Amazing visuals, great soundtrack, better controls, fun dungeons, all of it. Its only flaw? Way the hell too short.
Dragon Quest: Rocket Slime – Great game. Perfect for the DS, but would’ve made a good PS1 title about 10 years ago. Kind of in the vein of Tron Bonne and Ape Escape, where things are too silly to be taken seriously, but you still feel involved enough to care about what happens next. Wonderful battle system, great writing, pretty visuals, fantastic game.
Hotel Dusk – Any time a game like this gets made, I’m happy. The DS is perfect for the graphic adventure genre,but only Phoenix Wright and this have taken the baton and run with it. Unless you count that witch-touching game a graphic adventure. Anyway, this game was pretty darn good, but it wasn’t without its flaws. The soundtrack, outside of the scenes where you’re talking to your sexy receptionist, is repetitive and annoying, and more importantly, there’s no easy way to find out what you’re supposed to be doing. In Sam and Max, you could just ask Max. In Shenmue, you could look at your notebook. But in this game, even if you write stuff down in your notebook, half the events in the game are triggered by knocking on a door or walking in some corner of a hallway, which leads to a whole lot of roaming around and trying to open every door every time you restart your game. Kind of annoying. Otherwise, good game.
Animal Crossing: Wild World – I picked this up to hold me off until Phantom Hourglass and Phoenix Wright 3. Honestly, I don’t know what took me so long. This game is awesome. Very few times have I actually done something like go to bed early just so I can wake up earlier the next day when Tom Nook’s store reopens so I can sell the rare fish I caught and pay my mortgage. This game is just great. If you’ve already played it, I don’t have to tell you any more. If you haven’t, buy it now. It’s still expensive, but I can almost guarantee you’ll hang on to it for the life of your DS.
What are ya watchin?: Didn’t see a lot this summer, but as promised about a month ago, I will tell you about the Simpsons Movie.
I hated this movie so much.
I love the Simpsons, or rather, I loved the Simpsons ten years ago. It’s arguably the most influential cartoon ever, and also the most influential show on my life. I quote the Simpsons all the time. I probably like Futurama more, and I’ve probably laughed harder at Family Guy, but for the middle 10 years of my life, the Simpsons was everything.
Of course, the newer seasons sucked, like, giant dongs. And I was worried going into the movie that it would be more of the same, but I read some reviews that were positive (actually, just about all of them were), and many of which enthusiastically so. So I went with a bunch of my friends. And when it was over, my friends all talked about how they liked it, and I just stewed. I wanted those 80 minutes back.
The comedy of the Simpsons has always been in the people of Springfield. Just about all of the great episodes in their prime involved a Simpson’s interaction with some member of the town, be it Apu, Mr. Burns, Moe, Skinner, Nelson, whoever. Think of a great episode, and there was a Springfield resident involved. The exceptions are episodes like Marge vs the Monorail, where the guest was simply Phil Hartman, so nothing really changed much.
But nowadays, Simpsons episodes focus on this week’s guest star. Tom Brady moves to Springfield! A new kid on the block (voiced by Orlando Bloom) is the object of Lisa’s affection! Homer goes on tour with Gnarls Barkley! This week… on FOX!!! Meanwhile, the residents are stuck making quick cameo appearances and saying their catchphrases and going away. Needless to say, this shit ain’t funny.
So what happened in the Simpsons movie? Well, in the first five minutes, we get our first egregious cameo by Green Day. To be fair, the Tom Hanks cameo was good, and the usage of Albert Brooks was nice, too . But what happens in the movie? The Springfield residents all get pissed at the Simpsons and drive them away from Springfield, which leads to about 40 minutes of nothing but the Simpsons family, which isn’t nearly as funny as it sounds. Add that to a terrible habit of overproduction (the movie is shot in CG, but made to look hand drawn, not to mention the annoying musical cues that pop up during the most inopportune times. I don’t recall a puff of a tuba accompanying Homer’s wacky antics at any point in the show’s prime), and I just spent the entire move slouched in my seat with a scowl on my face, waiting for it to end.
I know everyone else liked it, so I’m probably alone. But maybe I can hold out hope that maybe everyone else are just shallow idiots, and I’m right, like always.
Now Surfing on the Intertron: Their next episode launches this weekend, but Consolevania just released a 50-minute documentary on the Scottish games industry that didn’t get nearly as much attention as it should’ve. I highly recommend it, even if you’ve never seen or don’t like Consolevania. Its just a nice look at the different levels of success people have had in the games industry, from the lowly cell-phone programmers to the indy group fresh off a sleeper hit to the cocky assholes behind Crackdown, all in the microcosm of Scotland. Check it out… if you’re not a fairy.
In football: Curse these Thursday night openers. Normally, I’d be in bed by now. Anyway, after a disappointing, but admittedly very strange NFL season’s worth of picks, I’m back again. This’ll be the last year of the trial run; I’ll have a real job at this time next year, which means plenty of money to throw away on actual picks. I hope. As always, I use the first current line I see on the ESPN.com Daily Lines page, which in this case appears to be BetUS.com. Home team in CAPS.
New Orleans (+6) over INDY: Will I never learn?
Pittsburgh (-4.5) over CLEVELAND: Not sure about this one. I don’t think the Steelers will be great, but I don’t think the Browns are much better.
Philly (-3) over GREEN BAY: Lot of road picks this week… maybe I’m doing it wrong.
ST. LOUIS (-1) over Panthers: Apparently neither team will be good this year. I’m betting on the Rams sucking less.
MINNESOTA (-3) over Atlanta: I hope Atlanta does well this season, even though their non-attending fans don’t quite deserve it. But for this week, I hope they fail.
New England (-6.5) over NY JETS: This is quite high. Not quite sure how I like this one. I know the Pats are good, though.
Tennessee (+6.5) over JACKSONVILLE: I’ve got Vince Young on my fantasy team. He better do well.
HOUSTON (+3) over Kansas City: I dunno.
Denver (-3) over BUFFALO: I do think the Bills will be quite good this year, though.
SAN DIEGO (-6) over Chicago: Nice to see ESPN.com hasn’t corrected the error which displays Chicago as “BEARS” despite every other team being the city name.
Tampa Bay (+6) over SEATTLE: Six seems a bit high for an average Seahawks team. Not that the Bucs are any good.
Detroit (+1.5) over OAKLAND: A good offense versus a good defense usually means the defense wins. But these are the Raiders. (Note that I’m completely omitting/disregarding the whole “But these are the Lions” logic, which makes a lot more sense.
NY Giants (+6) over DALLAS: I’m picking too many underdogs this week, aren’t I?
Baltimore (-2.5) over CINCY: And too many road teams as well.
SAN FRANCISCO (-3) over Arizona: There, that’ll even it out.
I’ll be back tomorrow with my season predictions. Maybe.
